5 Tips on How to Raise unspoilt Children
As a parent we often hear the phrase ˇ˝I want thisˇ˝ or ˇ˝I want that.ˇ˝ For many parents being able to buy their children things that they want makes them feel successful. They want their children to be happy and to like them. Yet fulfilling your childˇ˝s every desire ultimately does them no favors. They grow up believing that the world owes them and that they should get what they want when they want it, hence the growing amount of consumer debt in our nation. So, being a good parent what can you do to raise unspoiled children?
1. Teach your children the difference between wants and needs. Every child needs a pair of shoes, but they donˇ˝t need a pair of popular $100 sneakers. There is no reason that your child needs a new toy every time you go to the store. Especially when they probably have a closet full that they donˇ˝t play with at home. I shop with a list and if my children ask for something that is not on the list I tell them, ˇ˝Sorry, itˇ˝s not on the list.ˇ˝ They also know that if they want things they can ask for it for their birthday or Christmas. My son really wanted some Yu-gi-oh cards but was not willing to pay for them himself. So he had to wait until his birthday.
2. Donate items that are not needed or played with Teaching your children that there are people less fortunate than themselves will help them realize how lucky they are. Every year go through your childˇ˝s clothes and toys and donate items that arenˇ˝t used anymore. Recently my children donated clothing to some families living in an apartment complex that burned down. My friend says that her children often pick nicer newer toys to give to those less fortunate and she lets them because it teaches them to give.
3. Realize that your child will compare themselves to others. It is human nature to compare ourselves to others. We will always come short of some and ahead of others. Your child may want a certain toy or item of clothing because their friend has it. If the item can be justified then buy it. If not explain to your child why the purchase just isnˇ˝t in the budget. Encourage your child to dream high. You may only be able to provide so much but he can work hard and achieve his dreams himself.
4. Teach your child to save and budget. Many young adults today do not know how to save or budget their money. They have never had to deny themselves of something and now that they donˇ˝t have their parentˇ˝s money supply they are hurting. Teaching your child to save and budget while young is a valuable skill. Growing up, we were required to save 50% of everything we earned. This trait continued to adulthood. My younger brother is going to law school right now and has saved enough money that the amount of student loans he had to take out for he, his wife, and daughter to live on was minimal. Give your child a clothing budget every fall and then let them do the shopping themselves. Allow a monthly allowance for activities. Once it is spent donˇ˝t give your child anymore. Your child will quickly realize how expensive things are and that they will need to shop around and budget their money to make it last.
5. Let your child earn rewards In real life you donˇ˝t receive something for nothing. Even to win the lottery you have to buy a ticket. So instead of just giving your child things let them earn it. In junior high my sister really wanted a pair of Girbaud pants, the popular brand at the time. But they cost considerably more than other brands and my parentˇ˝s couldnˇ˝t justify the cost. So they reached an agreement if my sister earned certain grades she would get the pants.