Gwyneth Paltrow – Top Psychotherapist Takes Aim At Paltrow Over Daughter’s Pierced Ears

22 June 2011 01:36

Gwyneth Paltrow

Top Psychotherapist Takes Aim At Paltrow Over Daughter’s Pierced Ears

A top Hollywood child psychotherapist has reprimanded Gwyneth Paltrow for giving in to her young daughter’s demands for pierced ears, insisting she’s setting herself up for a bigger fight the next time Apple wants something her mother disapproves of.
Paltrow recently revealed she allowed her daughter to get her ears pierced when she turned five after the youngster pestered her famous parents for three years.
The actress and her rocker husband Chris Martin initially refused but caved in when little Apple asked mum why her Spanish friends were allowed to wear studs – and she wasn’t.
Paltrow said, “Our nanny is Spanish, so the kids both speak Spanish and are very much connected to the Spanish culture, and in Spain little girls get their ears pierced when they’re born. Apple would see little Spanish girls and says, ‘Why can’t I have my ears pierced too.’ When she was five we let her have her ears pierced.”
But Dr. Fran Walfish insists Paltrow may have have created a monster by giving in to her daughter’s demands.
She tells WENN, “Giving in to your toddler or youngster’s demands may be reinforcing the very thing you want to get rid of. You are inadvertently teaching your child to fight you longer and harder next time. Parents must create a structure with clear boundaries that reflect their personal family values.”
Dr. Walfish, the author of The Self-Aware Parent, has also taken aim at Paltrow’s cultural argument, adding, “I understand the Spanish culture where, in Spain, little girls get their ears pierced when they’re born. But the Paltrow/Martin family is American/British and it’s perfectly OK for them to hold to their initial decision to not have their daughter’s ears pieced.
“It is very important for young children to understand who compiles their family unit. The nanny is an employee who could leave her job abruptly if her personal circumstances change or she’s offered a better opportunity. Parents need to define what is comfortable to them and stick to it.
“From everything I have seen and read, Gwyneth Paltrow is a good mom. But how she can or cannot be swayed by the power of her child’s demands at the young age of five sets the standard for what she can expect during the turbulent teen years.”