Tuesday: Defending kids against porn

Google image/child not related to topic

Editor’s notes: If you came to this site because you – yes you – searched for “kiddie” and “porn” you are a very sick individual. I – of course – isolate the legitimate searches of parents and genuine professionals.  Those people do not use your search words. The rest of you who clearly are looking for indecent images of children – you should be thoroughly ashamed of yourselves. FYI: your IP addresses and the words you choose SHOW up on Google and I will forward your IP address to the authorities. I can look up where you live. If you are looking for filthy images of children – you need urgent help.  Go ask for it. This is a second chance. 

Children NEVER ask for your disgusting advances on them. I believe that GOD is watching you even if you hide behind an anonymous ID on your computer. People like you are hurting our society and families. As a professional caregiver of precious innocent children I can tell you that children are born innocent and they deserve an age of innocence. You have no right to encroach on that. For parents visiting this site please tell your children that pedophiles can be kind people that are really just bad. Don’t hide the reality from them. I get too many hits on posts like this with disgusting search words like “Kids” “Little Girls” and “Porn” – not to connect the dots. There is a tide of perverts on the internet looking for pictures and videos of children being hurt. I apologize for this intrusion on innocent researchers and parents. Your searches are not what I am talking about. 

Don’t you think that Google should automatically hand over IP addresses to the authorities that deliberately search for child porn? I do … have your say!

Nanny X

Original Post

By Nanny X

Following yesterday’s problem I wanted to continue on the subject of protecting our children’s innocence. So I contacted Tom Scales and Jill Starishevsky co-founders of The Innocence Revolution: A Global Day to End Child Sexual Abuse.  I asked them for an interview.  
1) Tom what is The Innocence Revolution about?
Tom: The Internet and the globalization of every aspect of society have made the sexual violation of children a worldwide epidemic.  If we do not address it globally, we have little chance of being successful protecting children. The Innocence Revolution was created to engage and mobilize societies around the world to say “NO MORE!!” to the sexual violation of all children. Pornography, in it’s many forms, feed that violation. For example, in the USA, 85% of men incarcerated for possession of child pornography, admit to sexually molesting a child.
2) In your
opinion are we facing a media saturation of sexual imagery. I’m thinking
specifically of companies like American Apparel that routinely pose young girls in provocative poses. What do you think this is doing to our
children? And in particular, our girls?

American Apparel sells clothes, so why do they peddle porn iconography?
Tom: There are no statistics,
but the clothing industry has conditioned the population that it sets the
patterns on clothing.  That is the
reason styles change and people buy to “stay in style”. These lessons are
learned early in life as kids watch the behavior of adults.  The sexual imagery in ads tells a child
he/she will be popular, successful and happy, if they adopt that style.  The process of marketing is highly
sophisticated and scientific today. 
Children have little intellectual maturity to recognize the enticement
3) Is there a correlation between the portrayal in the
media of violence and a loss of innocence in childhood?
Tom: I
have not seen any credible statistics on this, so it is almost an impossible
question to answer.  Here again the
real question is “Is the level of sex and violence in the media acceptable for
me and my family or you and your family. 
Does the family have any fundamental values against which it assesses
these situations? Statistics
can be misleading and manipulated. The real test is parents defining their personal values and living them.
If you think it is inappropriate for you, by definition it should be
inappropriate for your children. 
If you think it is inappropriate for your children, as the responsible
adult, you should not permit them to watch.
4)Would you as an
adult recognize the behavior of a predator, who was grooming or sexually
violating a child? And would you
recognize the behaviors of a child that should raise alarms that the child is
at risk or actually being sexually violated?  
Tom: This is an excellent resource:  www.TAALK.org
5) How can
parents protect their children against what feels like an epidemic of
sexual images in the media?
Tom: Model
the behavior you want to see in your children. Demonstrate a high degree of
respect for privacy among adults and with the children. Do not watch
shows/movies that have explicit images-viewership drives content and funds next
similar film. If
you watch it, you are demonstrating to kids that it is okay and consistent with
your family’s values.
6) Online porn is now viewed on average by children as
young as 11. What can parents do to protect their children’s online viewing?
(I-pad, Smart Phones, etc)

Tom: Parents
can use Covenant Eyes http://www.covenanteyes.com
7) In your opinion is there a pornification of our
culture? What action can parents take collectively to lobby against sexual
images on TV, in video games and in high-street magazines?
Tom: There
are no easy answers for this. 
Pornography is certainly proliferating at an extraordinary
pace in our society driven by the Internet and filming devices. First and
foremost, these materials and services exist because there are buyers. Every
time you attend a movie with violence and nudity, you confirm to the
entertainment industry that you approve of it.  Second, pornography turns the women/men in the images into
objects.   Once they are objects
in the mind of a viewer, I suspect there is little emotional connection to the
image as a person.  If we teach
children to objectify others, I think we are numbing their sense of empathy and
increasing the range of inappropriate actions they might consider okay.
8) How can parents teach their children about sexual
health without introducing adult themes or fear?
Tom: In
my experience the ones most afraid of adult themes are the adults. There are
mature, appropriate and healthy ways to discuss matters of sexuality, personal
boundaries and personal relations with a child. Purchase a copy of Tough Talk
to Tender Hearts (available from www.VOICE today.org) and apply the
guidance.  It isn’t perfect, but
should help a lot.
Parents can use
real language with the actual names of the body parts so the child is properly
informed.  A vagina is a vagina,
not a “pocketbook” or a “cookie”. Code words demonstrate adult fear and minimize
the importance of the message. Go to training or practice in front of a mirror
so you can say the words. Start
teaching your child about healthy sexuality and personal boundaries when they
are able to wash themselves in a tub. 
If they are older, read a workbook like Tough Talk to Tender Hearts and
cover the material you have not discussed.
9) Do you believe that schools have a positive role to
play in the battle to keep our children innocent?
Tom: Yes,
but we have virtually eliminated the ability of our schools to demonstrate
ethics and morals. The behavior of the staff and teachers demonstrate to
children appropriate actions in groups. 
They should be an extension of the teaching a child gets in the
family.  They are not responsible
for teaching values and ethics for kids, parents are.
10) Can toys and video games potentially groom children
to be sexually precocious? 
Tom: Remember,
if you believe an outfit is sexually provocative or inappropriate and you allow
your child to play with it, the child is learning that that dress code is okay with you and they may want to dress that way, as they get older. There
is a core issue underlying all questions and answers here.  The suggestive or provocative clothing
or sexually explicit images in media or violence in all forms, does two things. They
tell a child what is okay in society and we should not be surprised when they adopt
these permissive values or aggressive behaviors. The process of anger/rage
management in many media presentations is increased violence (vengeance).  Then we are all shocked when a portion
of our society acts that out. Secondly, we are telling the child that some one
else, a company, and ad agency or a statistician, is the one who should set
values.  And values are only based
on perceived level of harm.  We as
a family agree with whatever media or ad agencies create as long as statistics
don’t show the harm.
Tom Scales is the author of Terrible Things Happened to Me: A True
Story of Violence and Victory.
He received the 2012 Georgia Author of the
Year Award for an inspirational book. Tom was named the 2012 Unsung Hero of the Year by Saving Our
Children and Families. 

For more information go to : http://www.theinnocencerevolution.net/